I Feel..

How do I feel?

Sometimes I don’t know how I feel.

Like the words have not been formed and nothing in the dictionary comes even close

Sometimes I don’t feel high or low.

Like am at the edge or something,

About explode with joy or implode from pain.. but I never know which.

So am still.

What causes us to feel anyway, and why is there so much hype about feelings anyway

We give it to much control

It’s the little button which control our moods and how we behave..

It get all the credit and the blame

The original puppet master, oh but you’d never guess.

They say the truth shall set you free

Its like fresh breeze on a humid day

Cool water after the dessert sun.

See the truth about feelings is that they are unreal

They are made up from a collation of instant decisions we make in our mind

And they can grow and fester within the boundaries we set or fail to

True these thoughts may  be triggered by external conditions, some beyond our control , some as a result of someone elses ‘feelings’

Its up to us the way we allow ourselves to react to our feelings.

Today I thought I felt something a bit like loneliness, although I was in the mist of friends

A string of pity thoughts led to this feeling I couldn't describe, all I know was it sucked my energy, smile and my good posture.

The longer I thought, the worse I felt.

Then I stopped...

Then it stopped.


©SweetestRuby 2013